Novell
I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids do you want?
Novell
“Do you have a charger?” is the new “Could I bum a cigarette?”
Novell
Sometimes I’ll catch my reflection in a mirror and I’ll be like, “oh no, that can’t be right.
Novell
Before criticizing my taste, remember that I like you.
Novell
Facebook should have a limit on times you can update your relationship status, after 3 it should default to ‘unstable’
Life should be more like Hockey. If somebody pisses you off, you beat the crap out of them, then sit in a penalty box for 5 minutes.
I wish I was as fat as the first time I thought I was fat.