Wooaahhh my belly just spoke parseltongue o_O I think I should eat now
I hate when I plan a conversation in my head and the other person doesn't follow the script #DamnTeenQuote
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they get up in the morning that's the best they're going to feel all day.
The top ten things men know about women: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.
A dry vagina is a sad place to be.
The best vibrator a woman can own is Micheal J Fox.
I hate when one of your tweets in which you made a horrible, inexcusable typo are retweeted. Now everyone knows what an illiterate ass I am.