I may have schizophrenia, but at least I have each other.
We're very sorry Mr. Bond, but it appears you have 213 sexually transmitted diseases, 18 of which are normally only found in sharks. We highly recommend you contact every woman you have been with in the last year.
The woman drowned her husband in the washing machine? I guess you could say she must have been quite... *puts on shades* agitated. YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH
Mother Earth must be getting senile...April showers are NOT supposed to bring May showers!
a monkey sucking penis is funny in every language!
Dear life, When I said "can my day get any worse?" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.
More people would drink responsibly if there was a brand of vodka named Responsibly.