Thank God for women. If it wasn't for them, us men wouldn't know that we do everything wrong.
When a guy calls a girl "doll" is the correct response to call him an "action figure"?
I don't think it's necessary for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to wear masks in an attempt to hide their identity.
I'll bet Chinese alphabet soup is very filling.
I don't see dead people, I just see people that I wish were dead.
I hate when my variety pack of Band-Aids runs low and I have to make sure that any cuts I get fit the remaining sizes.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.