Tampon makers have announced that they will be replacing their tampon string with tinsel. They'll only be available for the Christmas period.
If you think you aren't creative, buy a gym membership and see how many excuses you find not to use it.
Stalking is where two people go on a long, romantic walk together but only one of them knows about it.
Did Bruno Mars catch that grenade? Haven't heard from him in a while...
Gambling addiction hotlines would be so much more effective if every 10th caller was a winner.
Not to get technical, but according to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.
Dave Asten
I always hold the door open for ladies, but they never want to get in the van...