If you want to take a bank teller out on a date, just ask her. Don't slip her a note at the window. Trust me on this.
When's my bye week?
As a funny prank, Clark Kent should go try to get his ear pierced.
Life is way more exciting in your forties. At any point you could sneeze wrong and end up getting emergency back surgery.
Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
Have you ever had a fly land on you screen and your first instinct was to scare it with the cursor?
We grow up having others' opinions of right and wrong pushed onto us: parents, society, iPhone autocorrect.