I bet M.C. Escher gave the worst directions ever.
Just gave my two weeks notice at the Halloween store. Jerks didn't even seem upset.
Over 10,000 birds die a year from crashing in windows. They must still be using Vista.
I don't need a flashlight to find my way around in the dark. I have shins for that.
How am I supposed to accept that a monkey as curious as George would never figure out the name of the "Man in the Yellow Hat"?
I'm going to get a tattoo of a grape. Over time it will wrinkle and become a raisin.
It would be awesome to make a cow laugh until milk squirted out of her nose.