My therapist thinks I have a god complex. How dare he say that unto me?
I'm so pissed at my company's IT people. I just found out hot, local single women have been trying to email me and they've been intercepting them.
You want scary? I'm going to be with my in-laws for Halloween.
Be careful when you say "there are no bad ideas." Some people will seriously go out of their way to prove you wrong.
The Playboy Mansion is the world's greatest nursing home at this point.
I used to work as a trapeze artist. Until I was let go.
Spell-check is always write.