Would Jesus wear a "What would I do?" sticker?
She has a body like baywatch but a face like crime watch.
One of the best feelings in the world is not having to set your alarm clock.
I'm scotch-tape-and-toilet-paper-for-bandaids poor.
Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.
Where does the road paved with bad intentions go?