Pet Tip: Put some crazy glue on your cat's favorite place to sit and you can have your very own Sphinx.
My retirement plan is more of a 401LOLJk
Jehovah's witnesses would probably be welcomed into more houses if they brought Girl Scout cookies.
I liked dubstep when it was called starting your dial-up modem.
According to this height / weight chart, I'm too short.
Somebody told me to "put my money where my mouth is". That sounds like a great way to catch a virus.
An omelet made terribly, is, at its worst, very good scrambled eggs.