I can't face my checkbook so I check my Facebook.
Well at least the puppy bowl was a competitive game
Illinois law covers murder in chapter 720. Seems like that should of came up a little earlier than chapter 720 when writing laws "ok, that makes 719, what's next...oh yeah, murder, that should be illegal"....
It's so cold outside I just saw Richard Simmons wearing pants.
Robert Zunick
Sleep is like sex, you never get enough of it and sometimes it feels like it never happened at all.
It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
They say don't burn bridges you may have to cross later, but I don't mind swimming if the bridge is already broken.