"Because it would be hilarious," is probably not a good reason to elect someone as president.
Xyuppi
Velcro is a ripoff
Xyuppi
I tried to give a cute waitress my phone number by writing it on the credit card receipt but accidentally tipped her 9 billion dollars.
Xyuppi
When I die, I want my tombstone to offer free WiFi, just so people will visit more often.
If my kids knew there was a light in the oven, they'd leave that one on too.
Cyberbilly
It's funny how things change when you get older. It seems like just yesterday I would spend my evenings on the front porch and treat myself to some killer weed. Now I spend my evenings in the front yard treating it with weed killer.
Describe yourself in three words: 1. Lazy