Funny Statuses

As soon as you think “maybe I can get up early and just finish it tomorrow” you’ve already lost.
The sign said 'Free Range Chickens'. So, I took three.
#14657
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Xyuppi
I think my car horn should sound like gunshots..... I bet you'll move then.
#14671
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Xyuppi
I think the Airlines should let you exit the plane on the inflatable slide if you're flying First Class.
Divorce is what happens when two people win an argument.
I just finish reading "50 shades of gray" by Sherwin Williams. I don't see what all the hype is about these paint brochures.
#15742
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Xyuppi
Halloween really is the perfect time to get rid of all those TacoBell hot sauce packets.
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