Funny Statuses

There should be an observation deck at Walmart.

I feel so stupid for cashing in my retirement account early. But then I always feel stupid using the Coinstar machine

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does

Do the Chinese realize that when they’re visiting America, they buy souvenirs made in their own country?

Ever talk to someone so stupid they make you squint?

I would’ve slept my way to the top years ago if it actually involved sleeping.

Is a rivalry between two vegetarians still called a beef?