Funny Statuses

#3395
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Cris
If my calculations are right, by November of 2019 my uneven usage of conditioner will finally lap the shampoo and I will run out of both at the exact same time.
Ever notice that people who usually wear sweatpants hardly ever sweat?
Sometimes I have to go outside to get signal on my phone for Facebook so yes, you could describe me as "outdoorsy."
#3586
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Cris
I’m in big trouble if my coworkers find out that I really don’t have Tourette’s
#3629
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Dave Asten
Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn’t get you anywhere.
Grab the bull by the horns. The other end is too gross...
The problem with taking the road less traveled is the poor phone signal...
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