I must have a great butt because every time I walk away from my coworkers I always hear 'What an ass'
It must be impossible for penguins to enjoy Casual Fridays.
Just finished my first book yesterday. 709 pages. Man, that was a lot of coloring...
Wear jeans every day and nobody cares. Wear a shirt twice in a row and you're suddenly homeless in the eyes of everyone.
I hope Snooki doesn't have problems belivering her baby. She'd hate to hear the doctor say "we have a little Situation here".
Be careful saying a woman's place is in the kitchen. That's where the knives are kept.
I changed all my passwords to "incorrect", that way, my computer just tells me when I forget.