The soundtrack in Hell is the Glee version of your favorite song.
You know you're getting old when speed limits start to seem reasonable to you.
My alarm clock probably thinks I have anger-management issues.
I never thought I would be one of those people to get into eating healthy and working out everyday. I was right.
An accurate pickup truck commercial would show people you haven't seen in 5 years calling & asking you to help move a couch.
Next time your in a silent elevator ride with a stranger, turn to her and say, "I'm sorry we're fighting."
I bought the required textbook for class, but that was only after I found out the final exam was open book.