Cyberbilly
If you're ever attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler.
I figured out why I don't like morning people. It's because I don't like mornings or people.
Nolan
When you put your hand out the window on the highway, make sure you're making a fist. That way, when a bug hits your hand, you're actually punching it at 70 mph.
Without coffee, I'm just a really tall 2 year old.
Blake Young
Campers: Nature's way of feeding mosquitoes.
Took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name.
Nillers
Warning: drinking before pregnancy can cause pregnancy.