Michael Mendoza
Anyone else sit on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
My Gmail is impenetrable to hackers in China because my password is just eight letter L's.
Dave Asten
I always hold the door open for ladies, but they never want to get in the van...
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windshield, it said 'Parking Fine.'
Baby is now 4 days past due date. Now I’m afraid he’s been warned by our other kids.
I survived the zombie apocalypse and all I got was this insatiable hunger.
If "wings" mean "diabetes" then yes, Red Bull gave me that.