Novell
Whenever a guy asks me "Don't I know you from somewhere? You look familiar." I always respond with, "Yes, I was the receptionist at the STD clinic. Nice to see you again."
Xyuppi
Life is never more confusing than when three people get together to order one pizza.
I need something that's more than coffee but less than cocaine.
Xyuppi
Whenever someone says they did something, "like a boss", I assume that means they didn’t do it at all and are merely taking credit for it.
Xyuppi
Taco Bell is selling fries. Burger King is selling tacos. KFC is putting Cheetos on chicken sandwiches. I knew we shouldn’t have legalized marijuana
I am not scared to kick a furious bear in the nut sack so take that
Ebay announced they’ll be starting up a social networking site too. If you join, nobody follows you until the last 2 minutes of every day.