Amigo
I think some people need to donate their blood, all of it.
Amigo
Flies only live for 24 hours. Except for the ones that get in your room. Those bastards live forever.
Back in my day, we didn’t have Instagram. We had to bore people in person with photo albums.
Novell
What do 95% of men do after an orgasm? Delete their browser history.
I wonder if spiders get as pissed off as I do when I walk through their webs.
So apparently the security guard at Kroger didn't believe that life gave me that lemon.
Xyuppi
Not sure if people stopped saying YOLO or if everyone who said it died.