Funny Statuses

9 out of 10 men like girls with big boobs rather than small boobs... the 10th guy likes the other 9 guys!
The easiest way for me to lose inches is to switch to the metric system.
Well that sucks. I go to all the trouble of kidnapping a Girl Scout and she doesn't even know how to make the cookies!
Another World's Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.
I hate that they put "use by" dates on condoms... like I'm not under enough pressure trying to get laid already.
#3732
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Amigo
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember all the things I was suppose to do.
I used to make fun of my dog for barking at dogs on TV until I caught myself in the car pulling over for a siren on the radio.
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