Anyone remember the good old days before Facebook, Instagram and Twitter? When you had to take a photo of your dinner, then get the film developed, then go around to all your friends' houses to show them the picture of your dinner? No? Me neither.
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
I started setting up my Google+ account this weekend. I think it's cute how Google plays dumb and asks me to fill in my personal information.
Just imagine how fast church would go if Busta Rhymes was the preacher.
To whoever has my voodoo doll, scratch between my butt cheeks... I'm in public
When I die, I want to be buried with some random animal bone just to confuse future archaeologists.
I have a horrible sleeping disorder where I have to wake up every morning and go to work.