Maybe it was inappropriate for a first date but if there's a maze on the menu I'm asking for crayons.
You know that feeling when you walk into a room and forget why you went in the second you get there? That's the Sims player controlling you, cancelling your action.
I wonder how many of those drug-sniffing dogs have to go to rehab.
Sometimes I watch basketball holding a ps3 controller just to screw with my grandpa's head.
Women are like police, they can have all the evidence in the world but they still want a confession.
What I hate most about Twitter: finishing a good tweet, having -1 characters left, and then having to decide which grammar crime to commi
You are the reason why I bite the heads off teddy grams!