Funny Statuses

In a thousand or so years, archaeologists are going to dig up tanning beds and think we cooked people as punishment.
Facebook makes high school reunions awkward. Hey, I haven't seen you 20 years. So how was that nap you took this afternoon?
A fun way to creep someone out is to take their Facebook profile picture and make it your Facebook profile picture.
I guess we'll never find out who let the dogs out.
#2735
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Austin Mulka
America: Gets called fat and stupid by all nations, beats the crap out of them in the Olympics.
#2744
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Cyberbilly
I bet if Aquaman and Jesus had a fight, Jesus would walk all over him.
I can't afford anti-depressants so I'm just drinking No More Tears shampoo.
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