Xyuppi
There are two reasons I would never drink toilet water: number 1 and number 2
I’ll rise, but I won’t shine.
Campaign spending in Iowa can't be a good measure because if that were true Flo the Progressive lady would have won.
Jon
I’m going to the gym because I heard they have free weights. I wonder how many they’ll let me take?
Xyuppi
I’m not a vegetarian but I eat animals who are.
Xyuppi
I always wonder if the people sitting near me at church every Sunday are unsettled by the fact that I look like I'm taking my communion like a shot of cheap vodka because I'm still in party mode from Saturday night.
I'm allergic to bears. One bear bite and it's straight to the ER for me.