My kid is so great at sharing that the whole family has pink-eye!
When I get married, I hope my wife keeps her name. I'd have a hard time learning a new one after all that time together.
If I was Neil Armstrong landing on the moon, "That's one small step for man," would have been, "Screw you every girl who ever shot me down!"
I'm such a bad cook I even struggle to make reservations.
Hey, Canada, you know that junk isn't really bacon, right?
Anyone else wonder about how ridiculous Batman's car insurance must cost? Think he's got comprehensive coverage, or just liability?
Amigo
Michael Jackson's new album ain't bad