Funny Status Ideas

In other news...the Seven Dwarfs have been advised that they can only meet in groups of six. One of them isn't Happy.

This is the first year my family isn’t getting together for Thanksgiving due to Covid. Normally we don’t get together because we hate each other

[inventor of teapot] “I want this water to scream."

What do you call a hen who can count her own eggs? A mathemachicken

I misplaced my pizza cutter, so I used my Bryan Adams CD. It cuts like a knife

I am forever disappointed that Chef Bobby Flay didn't name his daughter Sue.

2020 is what happens when you mix your Tarot deck with Cards Against Humanity