Funny Status Ideas

The organ section of the black market does not have instruments.

You can catch flies with honey, but you catch more honeys being fly!

I'm holding cheerleader try outs for my "Fantasy football team". Full outfits are encourage but not necessary.

I miss the good old days when I used to think T-mobile was a rapper.

I think people who use the wrong word should have the humidity to admit it.

Always remember to the change the oil in your time machine once every 6 months or 3,000 years.

‪I shouldn't have driven home from the bar last night. Especially since I walked there. ‬