So I'm stuck in traffic and nothing is moving. Suddenly, a man knocks on my window. I roll down the window and ask, "What's going on?" he says "Terrorists have kidnapped Congress, and are asking for a $10 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, taking up a collection." "How much is everyone giving, on average?" I ask. The man replies, "About a gallon."