I bet Sean Connery only ever asked his wife to sit in his lap the one time.
I just removed my hard wood floor in my bedroom and found a beautiful carpet underneath.
I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.
I buy my condoms at Costco. When you go through them like I do, you need a place with a really good return policy.
Women have a lot more experience dealing with bloodstains than men. Men are convicted of murder a lot more than women. Coincidence?
King: How many volunteers do we have for my evil army? Squire: 384 my liege K: Ok, round them up S: 400 my liege.
If you rearrange the letters of "postmen" they get really pissed off.
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