The trouble with being punctual is that nobody is there to appreciate it.
It’s so nice outside I should probably close the blinds so there isn’t a glare on my screen.
The pollen levels are so high this year that it has the crackheads trying to convert their meth back into Sudafed...
Egg salad is just another form of chicken salad.
I'm good at counting cards. I keep ending up with 52.
Sometimes I add things to my to-do list that I’ve already done just so I can immediately cross them off.
Wow comma I just realized if I tap the microphone on my keyboard I don't have to type out my statuses anymore exclamation point
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