I should have told my wife I was referring to her memory BEFORE comparing her to an elephant.
If the number 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still number 2?
Yesterday I accidentally swallowed a bottle of food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
Happy Leap Year Day (Leap Day?) to everyone! Or, as the military calls it "Shoulda been Payday".
People who try to test my patience don't realize it's an exam I don't plan on passing.
There was a glorious time, before social media, when you would just lose touch with people.
Saturday mornings without cartoons is now officially called "Sadurday"
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