Meal prepping is basically eating a week's worth of leftovers from a meal that never happened.
I’m not shy, I’m just really good out figuring out who is not worth talking to.
I need something that's more than coffee but less than cocaine.
Imagine being naked in a room full of people who speak a different language and everyone wants to touch you. That is the life of a dog.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye, but she was seeing someone on the side.
Tiger Woods should not have ignored his caddie when he told him to use the driver.
Uni-Ball pens missed one hell of an endorsement opportunity with Lance Armstrong.
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